Why Set Backs Set You Up

Copy of Copy of Untitled (2)

This week I had a personal set back.  I'm not quite ready to talk about it yet... so I dug through the archives and found this blog post that still resonates deeply. 


Have you busted your butt, and gone outside your comfort zone to do something you truly believed in, only to be let down by people in your circle who you thought had your back? 

I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir. 

Most of you are in the dance field.... and let's be real, shall we? You don't just jump into the dance world without knowing the road will be tough, bumpy, and a little scary. 

Plus the scenery overall is pretty meh.  I mean, dance studios don't vary that much... 

(That's why the costumes are so sparkly y'all.)  

But I do have to share something that happened recently. 

This past summer I have been reading, listening, learning, growing and building my businesses. It's been hard. 

And it's been awesome. 

It's also been really lonely, and daunting at times. Many times I'm feeling like nothing is working in the day to day.  

SO, last December, two weeks before Christmas, I emptied my savings account to hire a coach. With her guidance, I was able to launch my BoogieFit Curriculum to studios all over the world with the press of a button. 

Crazy! It was super exciting, and scary. 

And now, 9 months later, I learned this past week that my "awesome coach" left my email list. 


My email list. 

Who cares? right? 

You might leave me right now. 

(please don't)

I've had friends leave my list. 

Close friends. 

So why do I care, about my coach? 


Because.  This is hard.

It's still work and it still takes a ton of effort.  It takes consistency, and guts, accountability... (which comes from you, so thank you) and honestly it's very lonely.  And I would think that my coach would not only understand, but be supportive and encouraging.  Even if it's just staying on my freakin' email list. 

So when someone that I thought would be my biggest cheerleader leaves my list, what do I do?

I sulked.

But then? 




I emailed her. 

Boom!  Yup.  That's right. 

I was having a stupid pity party about it, and feeling like I sucked and wanted to know what in the world I could do to make her experience better. 

And what did she say? 

This blew me away.  

As a business owner, entrepreneur, studio owner, dance teacher, and mama, I was so appreciative that the time was taken to address my sniveling water works.  It wasn't that she found my emails useless, or rambling, or that my content didn't have value. 

It was worse... and yet, I totally get it. 

You see, we are always trying to be better.  To learn from others. To grow and develop that little seed that was planted - perhaps years ago- into great, amazing, inspiring fruit. 

Sometimes... with all that reading, and listening, and watching great content, your focus or goals get pulled off course.  And guess what. You end up spinning your wheels. 

You realize your business, your great idea, your huge goals aren't being met because you keep running from one shiny object to the next.  And this is exactly what my business coach told me.  In fact, it was because of my blog, that she decided to start her own video email to her members. 

huh. :) 

And y'all, this was the gem of her response to me, and quite frankly, I've been hit by it from all areas in my life these past couple weeks. 

Go back to what you wanted to do, or were good at and STAY THE COURSE.  Do the daily activity you need to do to get yourself out in front of the pack.  "It's the day to day work...


and over, 

and OVER."

And guess what? It's true y'all.  I'm seeing the beautiful fruits of my labor.  My numbers are up over 25% this year.  Consistency in the day to day. Every. Day.

So, listen to what's in your heart.  Trust it.  Go for it.  And know that you will have obstacles... lots of them, and unicorns aren't real. 

And remember, anyone who has made it big, just failed and picked themselves up one more time.


Melissa - Creator of Boogie Fit Curriculum




Susan Hall

I too got punched in the gut yesterday & it ruined the rest of my day. I'm still not sure how I feel but I'm doing better this morning. I hope you're working through it. Prayers!

Read more
Read less
Melissa Rose

I'm sorry to hear that Susan.  Coincidently it's a full moon on Friday the 13th which is this week.  Food for thought.  But those set backs can totally mess with our heads and ruin our days.  Hoping you're one step further in the right direction!  Thanks for sharing! Prayers back to you lady!

Read more
Read less

Leave a comment